You and your Higher-Self…

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Last week I wrote about Ego and Fear being the head of our Safety and Security Department (physical safety) and how we have placed them in the role of our Life Guidance System. A job that they were never meant to have. So, Who is supposed to head up our Life Guidance System? You. Just not the present you that is struggling through life at the current moment. Confused? I was too.

so…lets start here…

Your Higher Self:

“Higher self is a term associated with multiple belief systems, but it’s basic premise describes an eternal, omnipotent, conscious, and intelligent being, who is one’s real self. Blavatsky formally defined the higher self as “Atma the inseparable ray of the Universe and one self.                             – Wikipedia

I like to think of my higher self as a library. A library all about me. It holds every life experience that I have ever undergone. Past, Present, Future. It knows my struggles, my fears, my judgements, my passions and what brings me joy and it wants me to be the best me I can be. Ego just wants me to be safe and deals primarily with the present and the past and hopes I make it to the future. When viewing it from that perspective I think I am going to go with me instead of Ego. Sorry Ego I love that you keep me safe but hate that you make me crazy with fear and self doubt.

How do you know when your higher self is communicating with you? Easy. Think of the last time you were doing something and really and truly were blissfully happy or at peace. That was your higher self. We all have voices in our heads…the ones that nag or talk you out of doing something you want to do and that voice sounds like you but whiny or frustrated or doubtful. Your higher self sounds like you too but rational, calm, loving. Can you think of a time you were sick, hurt, lost or afraid and there was a calm voice telling you everything was going to be okay and that voice was yours but lacked the pain, fear, hurt or judgement? That was your higher self. Trust that. It knows you are going to be ok.

Your higher self also communicates with you through inspiration and excitement. Example: (and continuing on with my creative saga from last week) About a year after my diagnosis of bipolar Sus and I moved to Vermont from Michigan. Ann Arbor to Burlington, both university towns and both artsy-fartsy in their own ways. Burlington has an exceptional art scene that Ann Arbor lacks.

Sus being Sus (always supportive, and always pushing me outside of my comfort zone as only an extrovert can) made contact with the local artists and mentors…and I am still fuzzy on details of that time period so I will proceed. Long story short…I started painting again and having shows. Honest to god, real shows…I was terrified. I was no longer a gifted child of 6, I was no longer a prodigy of 12, I was in my 30’s. I was hearing my parent’s voices co-mingled with my Ego voice telling me that I was going to fail. I wouldn’t cut it, I couldn’t produce what anyone out there wanted to see. I was old, I was a has been, no more gifted child bullshit to push me through. (Not to mention all the bipolar stuff I was still trying to come to terms with).

I think if I had continued with this train of thought I would have stalled out and hid my paintings away but I was very aware of something, just under the surface, that I hadn’t explored. I brought up my fears in therapy (I had a great therapist while we were in Vermont) and with her help I realized that what was just under the surface of fear and self doubt was hope and excitement. How odd…for me at least. I continued painting and it felt incredibly right, a had a mentor, I had shows and participated in First Friday Art Walk, First Fifty and sold paintings. The more I participated the less I feared putting myself out there and the less I believed what my parents had told me.

A childhood wound that had festered was beginning to heal. It took me several more life events to figure out the Ego and Higher Self dynamic but I am glad that I put the pieces together and I am glad that I put them in their correct functioning positions. It makes life easier.  Always remember, if you are excited or inspired by a thought, event or plan that you are thinking through that is your Higher Self telling you that you are on the right path…follow it, be happy. Give Ego its old job back. It likes being in charge of your physical safety.

Not to mention that with Ego back in the Safety and Security Department, you and your Higher Self can get on with the important task of living your life and finding your life purpose.

 

Photo taken by Pamela in Udaipur, India with a Nikon DSLR 5300

 

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