Finding God…


in this modern world can be difficult. Events led by radicals in the name of god and the strict and sometimes hateful and disempowering doctrine and dogma of organized religion can be off putting not to mention damaging. Growing up in a fundamental household I can relate firsthand to the appeal of turning away from god and religion. I felt very uncomfortable with the hypocritical state of existence that my parents adhered to. I could not comprehend their hate wrapped in loving Christian virtue and I therefore turned my back on religion and god. Their religion and their god.

I became a seeker. I sought for god in a myriad of religions and always found the same issue. Hate, lovingly wrapped, in religious virtue. How did we get this way? Was it always this way? These have been my two most frequently pondered questions and although I don’t ever really seem to come to one hard and fast answer I have discovered that our entire societal system is impacted by it. I like to think of it in terms of High School. We are attending the same high school and we all belong to different cliques. Why? We are all at the same school so why must we divide the masses into various groups and then fight each other over who has the best group? We essentially took something that unifies and created division. Why do we do this? Why do we allow it? As it turns out religion has nothing to do with God and everything to do with us.

Most of our societal institutions are not just broken they are dead and starting to rot, unfortunately what once worked isn’t any longer and that is leaving people feeling disenchanted, alienated and wanting change but we don’t handle change well, which is funny because its as inevitable as death and taxes. Those that can’t handle change at all or were benefitting from the pre-existing now defunct format are trying to hold onto the status quo like its Golem’s ring. Fear and Lack. I am starting to realize just how influential those two things can be. If you can figure out what a person fears or feel they lack you can control the world with that information. If you want to change the world, help that person to deal with that fear or lack concept.

But, what about God?

It turns out that I am choosing to believe in God but not in the stereotypical religious way. A bit of play on the concept of separation of the Church and State. I am choosing to separate Church and God and given my life experiences, I can not in all good faith deny the existence of a higher power. I have had three close encounters with Death and a handful of oddities that support something is at work in the universe.

God is unfathomable. God is infinite. God is pure consciousness and pure energy; God is a force. God is beyond time and space. All of this makes God an incredibly daunting entity so I understand our very human need to make God knowable. We have perverted that “made in God’s Image” to equate that God is like us when the truth is very humbling. We were simply imagined; a thought. A thought that is playing out a simple game of conscious awareness. All of life falls into this category so we really can’t claim to be the epitome of special.

We were meant to be stewards and co-exist with the rest of creation in a perfect state of inter-connected balance and we have instead become slaves to our fears and reached the same status as a virus or cancer. We consume everything in our path and think that technology or God will save us in the end if things go horribly wrong. I am sorry to tell you this but we are the system/technology put into place to maintain balance. Be mindful, be aware, find a version of God that you can live with and reconnect.



Photo taken by Pamela with Nikon DSLR 5300. Shimla, Himachal Pradesh, India



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