Life After the Hospital…

was bittersweet. I was overjoyed to be home and yet, being home was hard and a bit of a let down. Things felt flat, anti-climatic…boring. The same thing that landed me in a fabulous mental health facility is the same thing that has you back at home before you are completely ready to be back;…

Neither/ Nor…

My fourth (and last) episode, a catastrophic, cyclone of Super-Mania with psychosis that resulted in me being hospitalized, was the turning point in my life. I always referred to this episode as being the best thing that ever happened to me and it is. I thought the universe had finally decided to work for me…

Haldi (turmeric) time again…

It is winter here in India and temperatures have cooled down to those we experience in late spring and early summer back in the States, which means there is an abundance of fresh produce available. One of those items being turmeric. Turmeric looks a bit like naked ginger or a thicker skinned Thai galangal. I…

The Either/Or Scenario

So, these freaky, unexplainable incidents that I would find myself in, or rather the aftermath of these incidents, always perplexed me and not knowing what to do with them or how to define them I did what anyone would do and I took turns blaming either myself, my parents or people I had a relationship…

The Brain on Mania…

My Parents and siblings had moved to another State so my father could attend Seminary and I moved in with the grandparents. My grandparents were wonderful people and I wish my living with them had been better but my bipolar train had already jumped the tracks and was hurtling through space on course to collide…

Somewhere in the Middle…

lies the truth and now looking back on the events of my life I see it for exactly what it is. Life in all its wonderfully painful glory. I could take you through all the other bipolar episodes and the fall out of each but there is really no need to. Those years of  so…

Pressure!

As horrible as my parents may sound at this juncture, I think it is only fair that I point out that I was by no means an angel. I was anti-social, sarcastically blunt, and just as emotionally distant as my father, which it turns out is the fuel that fed his wrath; my father and…

A Series of Unfortunate Events…

is what broke the camel’s back in my severely strained relationship with my father and for years I was angry with him. I thought he was being unfair and harsh and I had yet to see my mom’s part in all of this and looking back, I honestly don’t know how I missed it. So,…

Life…

Is never dull. I didn’t get a post published yesterday. Sus and I met up with friends for lunch and having such a wonderful time…lunch almost ran into dinner. Lots of fun and laughs and a much needed break from the everyday. Today, although, not filled with fun, friends and food isn’t going quite as…

Momma Mia…

here we go again…it’s mom’s turn. My relationship with my mother was fairly mundane. We had our differences but I always believed that she had my back. My childhood was pretty fantastic thanks to her. She was the quintessential Kool-Aide mom. Fresh baked cookies always cooling in the kitchen, always kissed a boo-boo before it…

Daddy Issues…

and yes, I am completely aware of how clichĂ© and anti-climatic this is but it is a tiny albeit, crucially important cog, in my wheel of self discovery. I have written about my mother, my brother, my sister; even my grandparents have been mentioned a time or two but I have never really gone into…

The Abyss.

What no one ever tells you is that once you jump, trip and fall or get a universal push into the Abyss you’re in there for life. Sounds frightful, Right? Well…what I found out is that it is much like Dr. Who’s Tardis; it is not what it appears to be. What it is, I…