here we go again…it’s mom’s turn. My relationship with my mother was fairly mundane. We had our differences but I always believed that she had my back. My childhood was pretty fantastic thanks to her.
She was the quintessential Kool-Aide mom. Fresh baked cookies always cooling in the kitchen, always kissed a boo-boo before it was covered with a bandage, she read to us faithfully, there were always craft projects, and she would play Rachmaninoff’s Flight of the Bumblebee on her piano every afternoon after we had done our Phonics lessons. She was awesome until I was in the third grade.
I am not really certain what changed, honestly, but I am fairly certain it was partially due to an inevitable hormonal influx. All that pre-teen stuff gearing up for teenage angst. I realize now that it had something to do with us being very different.
Mom likes to nurture, which often than not turns into micro-managing; I am fiercely independent. She loves a crowd, the more the merrier; I wither at the mere thought of a group comprising of more than three individuals. She effortlessly floats from thing to thing; I like structure, plans and back-up plans. She thrives on drama, gossip and social niceties; I find it all a waste of time. She likes to shake, rattle and roll; I prefer a cozy nook and a book or six. Different.
The differences didn’t stop there. My mom is a girly-girl, pastels, lace, dresses and make-up galore. If it glitters, sparkles or shines, contains ruffles, lace or fringe, and comes in soft feminine colors my mom has to have it. I was (still am) a tom-boy. Give me jeans and cropped hair and I am good to go and my color preferences are black and navy blue. I like low maintenance. This caused issues, not really anything major, just your average run of the mill stuff.
I found my mother to be a flaky, busy body and I unwittingly trusted her more than I should have believing her to be too scattered and preoccupied to be harmful. What I didn’t realize until much later in my life is that my mom needs to be needed. So much so that she will manipulate situations in order to cause discord so she can step in and save the day but only if it is convenient for her, which means that if there is something better on offer what ever war she instigated can just wage a little longer. She will save all involved later…if she feels like it.
Photo: Mother and Child, The Virgin Mary with Christ Child, Notre Dame, Paris France. Nikon DSLR 5300